Do You Really Need Sex for Your Marriage to Work?

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6 comments

  1. Evangeline says:

    I believe sex is important and needed in a marriage mainly because God designed it that way. It creates a bond, which is why it’s to be between a married couple.

    • Tiffany Godfrey says:

      I agree. So many woman take sex in marriage too lightly, but when we make the decision to line our marriage and hearts up with the Word, sex is not an option, but a mandate. Also, when we have a heart to please God and our husbands, sex can be great!

  2. Connie Scala says:

    I believe sex is very important in marriage. It is a special bond God created to keep the mariage sacred. My husband and I have not had sex in almost 3 years. He has lost interest in me physically. All this came about when he went on fb and hooked up with someone from his past. Now he spends all his free time either texting her or on the phone with her. She has become like a cancer to our marriage. She has ruined every evening, every holiday, every weekend by sending him sex texts. I have spoken to him about this repeatedly and yet he does nothing except say that he does not return the feelings to her that she has so openly displayed and displays to him. I pray about this and have turned it over to God. I do not believe him bc I have seen texts he has returned to her. I don’t want a divorce I want my marriage to heal and get beyond this. He told me the other day she is now helping him get his son back into his life after a nine year absence. She has found my husbands weak point his son and now she is doing whatever she can do to infiltrate that area. This is very hurtful to me and he just does not seem to care about how this is affecting me and my mental status. I am very lonely for my my husband and I have no idea how to get her out of our life and out of our marriage. It has been 2 very long years of misery.

    • Tiffany Godfrey says:

      Hi Connie:

      Thanks so much for your honesty in sharing your story. I think many of us have felt lonely in our marriage for one reason or another. The one thing you said that is so important is turning it over to God. I believe that turning things over to God does require prayer, but it also requires getting closer to Him, (James 4:8). It’s so easy to feel sorry, hurt, and lonely when things are not going well in marriage, but Jesus is the best Person to turn to because others, can often lead you in the wrong direction. There are so many ways to draw closer to Him. One of the ways of course is to seek Him through His Word. A great place that I have often started while going through my trials has been the Psalms. They will bring comfort because they will show you who God is and the power He has to change things when you’ve tried everything else. I’ve also read some great books on God and receiving His love. Some include:
      – Tell Them That I Love Them by Joyce Meyer
      – The Love Languages of God by Gary Chapman (He’s the same person who wrote The 5 Love Languages)
      – Reduce Me to Love by Joyce Meyer
      During this time, constantly bathe your husband, your marriage, and yourself in prayer asking Him to lead you on this situation and deal with the both of you. You could ask for healing, restoration, and the grace to walk through this situation.

      As far as your husband is concerned, the best thing you can do is pray for him, but you can do some other things to try to work on your marriage. If you know for sure your husband is having an affair, even if it’s just emotional, here’s a site that can be of help to you: http://nicoleconline.com/
      Also, you may want to consider the following things even if you have to go alone at first:
      – Marriage counseling from a Christian counselor. Pray and ask God to lead you and if you know of anyone in your church who can share names of some good counselors that would be great. You could start with your Pastor if you feel comfortable.

      – You can attend the Weekend to Remember event. Although the goal is for couples to attend together, many women have gone alone and have gained so much from the event. These events are held all over the country, so you can find one near you. Here’s the link to learn more about this event: http://www.familylife.com/events/featured-events/weekend-to-remember

      Hope this helps and I will be praying for you. 🙂

  3. I would have some issues dealing with that, but if you can rationalize him cheating and it to be o.k. for you then it would be acceptable for you. All relationships are different and some could deal with that, my husband and I are very honest and we both have great trust in one another and if that trust is broken then there lies the problem but if the trust was never there with that then I don’t see why you would have a problem

  4. Tiffany Godfrey says:

    Hi Signs of Husband Having Affair:

    I don’t think anyone wants their husband to cheat on them. I’m glad that you and your husband are very honest with one another. I think that’s the only way to have a healthy marriage.

    But there are some women who have suspicions that their husbands are cheating, with no truth, and they still need help, encouragement, and resources. Then for those who know their husbands are cheating, they need help as well. In either case, God should be at the forefront because decisions will need to be made especially when extramarital sex is involved, children are involved, and emotions are involved.

    Adultery is never an easy situation to navigate through, but there are some women who have gone through it and came out victoriously. Some have stayed in their marriages and others have divorced. But whatever choice is made in the situation, it should be bathed in prayer, godly counsel, and based on truth.

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